"GET SHORTY" by Scott Frank Based on a novel by Elmore Leonard BLACK MAN'S VOICE Looks fuckin' cold out there. EXT. VESUVIO'S RESTAURANT – MIAMI DAY It is cold. People walk by hugging themselves, pulling up their collars, etc. INT. VESUVIO'S RESTAURANT – SAME TIME CHILI PALMER, late thirties, sits in a booth with TOMMY CARLO, a low level mob type. Chili smokes a cigarette, stares out the window at the people on the street. TOMMY Guy on the radio said it's gonna get down to thirty-four. Chili watches a woman on the sidewalk pause to tighten the scarf around her neck. She looks in the window, sees Chili looking out. TOMMY Thirty-four -– that's freezing, for Christ sake. (then) Yo, Chili, you're spacin'. Chili turns and studies Tommy a moment, then... CHILI They're closing the Granview. You know, theater down on Biscayne? TOMMY Yeah, the guy owes Momo a few G's. CHILI What I'm thinkin' is maybe Momo could buy it. Tommy looks at him. CHILI Momo could buy it, I could run it for him. Show some Cagney films. TOMMY What's Momo gonna want with an old place, shows old movies people don't care about no more. Outside of maybe turnin' it into a porno house, I don't think he's gonna give much of a fuck. And you already got a job. Chili looks back out the window again. CHILI Yeah. We hear LAUGHTER OFF SCREEN and then FOCUS on the window so that Chili can now see a GROUP OF MEN reflected there, sitting at a table nearby. We hear MORE LAUGHTER and now Chili turns and looks over at... RAY "BONES" BARBONI Mob guy: tall, loud suit with lots of jewelry. As he gets up from the table, the other men around the table follow his lead as he finishes up some jokes. MOB GUY ...so the guy says, I'm not the tailor, I'm the undertaker. The men laugh again, more out of respect than appreciation. Ray Bones turns, sees... Chili and Tommy sitting in their booth. Tommy, sucking on a toothpick, waves. TOMMY Ray. How you doing? RAY BONES Okay, Tommy. You? TOMMY Okay. Bones focuses on Chili, waits for acknowledgement. But Chili turns back to the window. Always the peacemaker, Tommy smiles at Bones again... TOMMY You believe this weather, Ray? Miami Beach, for Christ's sake. RAY BONES (ignoring him) Chili Palmer. (smiles) Chilly outside. Chili inside. It's a regular fuckin' chili-fest. Hey, waiter -– give Mr. Chili Pepper a big fuckin' bowl of chili! Again the men all laugh respectfully at Ray Bone's stupid joke. Chili smiles the best he can at the idiot... CHILI Good to see you, Ray. He turns back to the window, watches Ray Bones in the reflection, still cracking up as he and his men head for the front of the restaurant. Tommy looks at Chili for a moment, then stands up... TOMMY You done starin' out the window, I'll see you back at the office. Chili nods, but still doesn't turn from the window. He merely watches in the glass as Tommy turns up his collar and steps out into the cold Miami day. TOMMY Jesus. It's freezin'! Chili then puts out the cigarette, nods to the waiter who comes over with the check. INT. RESTAURANT COATROOM – A FEW MINUTES LATER From inside the tiny room. A couple of ratty rain coats and an old flight jacket hang to one side in immediate foreground as Chili steps into the doorway and freezes. He looks o.s. and whistles... CHILI Hey. A moment later the MANAGER, an old Italian guy in a black suit, joins him in the doorway. CHILI What happened to my coat? The Manager peers into the room... MANAGER It's not one of these? CHILI You see a black leather jacket, fingertip length, like the one Pacino wore in Serpico? You don't, you owe me three seventy-nine. MANAGER Maybe you don't see my sign? The manager points to a sign on the wall: "WE CANNOT BE RESPONSIBLE FOR LOST ARTICLES" CHILI Look, I didn't come down to sunny Florida to freeze my ass. You follow me? You get the coat back or you give me the three seventy-nine my ex- wife paid for it at Alexander's. The Manager looks OFF SCREEN, and begins speaking in Italian. Chili reacts as we hear the name RAY BARBONI mentioned a couple of times. MANAGER Explain to him how Mr. Barboni borrow the coat. A WAITER joins Chili and the Manager in the doorway. CHILI Ray Bones took my coat? Just now? WAITER He didn't take it. He borrow it. See, someone took his coat, you know... (indicates flight jacket) ...leave this old one. So Mr. Barboni, he put on this other coat that fit him pretty good. CHILI You mean my coat. WAITER He was wearing it, you know, to go home. He wasn't gonna keep it. CHILI My car keys were in that coat. MANAGER We call you a taxi. CHILI Lemme get this straight. You aren't responsible for any lost articles like an expensive coat of mine, but you're gonna find Ray Bones' coat or get him a new one? Is that what you're telling me? MANAGER Mr. Barboni is a good customer. (making sure to add) Works for Jimmy Capp. CHILI I know who he works for. Where's your phone. INT. TOMMY CARLO'S CAR – DAY Tommy drives. Chili stares straight ahead, rubs his hands together, tries to stay warm... TOMMY You sure it was Ray Bones took the coat? CHILI That's what the guy said. TOMMY (nervous now) Tomorrow, I see on the TV weather, it's gonna be nice and warm. You won't need the coat. Chili points out the window. CHILI This is it. EXT. VICTOR HOTEL – DAY As Tommy pulls up out front. INT. CAR – SAME TIME Tommy looks up at the hotel as Chili takes a pair of leather gloves from top of the dash, opens the door. Tommy looks over at him. TOMMY Hey, Chili. (Chili pauses) Get your coat, but don't piss the guy off, okay? It could get complicated and we'd have to call Momo to straighten it out. Then Momo gets pissed for wasting his time and we don't need that. CHILI Don't worry about it. I won't say any more than I have to, if that. EXT. STAIRS – DAY Chili pulls on the gloves as he goes up the stairs to the third floor. EXT. DOOR – DAY As Chili knocks on the door three times. He waits, pulls the right-hand glove on tight, so that when RAY BONES opens the door, Chili nails him. One punch. No need to throw the left. RAY BONES Jesus... Oh, God... Chili then steps over him into the room and grabs his coat from a chair. He looks over at Ray Bones bent over, blood running from his nose and mouth, blood all over his hands, his shirt. RAY BONES Fuck, man... Chili walks out. Doesn't say one word to Ray Bones. EXT. BARBER SHOP – DAY A warmer day. The sun is shining. All is quiet. INT. BARBER SHOP – SAME TIME The place is empty except for FRED and ED, the two old barbers sitting in the chairs, reading newspapers. ED You been there, haven't you? INT. BARBER SHOP BACKROOM – SAME TIME A room Tommy and Chili use as an office. Chili sits at the desk making entries in the collection book. We can hear the two old barbers talking OFF SCREEN... FRED (O.S.) Paris? Yeah, I been there plenty times. It's right offa Seventy-nine. ED (O.S.) Hell it is. It's on Sixty-eight. Seventeen miles from Lexington. FRED (O.S.) What're you talking about, Paris, Kentucky, or Paris, Tennessee? Silence. No answer to the question. Chili look up from the collection book, listens a moment to nothing. He opens the desk drawer and pulls out a .38. He aims the gun at the open doorway... OVER CHILI'S SHOULDER As Ray Bones, a bandage on his nose, appears in the back hall, then the doorway to the office, his face showing surprise to see a gun aimed at him... Ray Bones begins firing the big Colt auto in his hand, maybe before he's ready, the gun making an awful racket, when Chili pulls the trigger, shooting Ray Bones along the top of his head, creasing him from hairline to crown. Chili calmly gets to his feet. Aims once more -– probably lower this time -– but doesn't fire as Ray Bones grabs his head and stumbles out of there. RAY BONES (O.S.) Somebody call 9 fucking 11. EXT. MIAMI HARBOR – DAY Ray Bones, a bandage on his head now as well as his nose, sits on a cigarette boat with his boss, JIMMY CAP and two bikini clad BABES, both of whom rub lotion on Jimmy. JIMMY Whatta you want me to do Ray? Go to war over a fuckin coat? You're lucky the guy didn't kill you. The coat was a Christmas present for Christ's sake. RAY BONES You gotta do somethin', Jimmy. This man's got no respect for us. JIMMY He's got no respect for you, and I don't gotta do shit. Chili Palmer don't work for me, he works for Momo up in Brooklyn. So as long as Momo's around, nothing happens to Chili Palmer. You understand? As an angry Ray Bones sits back, we... FADE TO BLACK: EXT. BROOKLYN STREET – NIGHT We TILT DOWN to REVEAL a dark Brooklyn street as a black Cadillac pulls to a stop in front of an older building. VOICE Momo. We're here. Two big guys, BODYGUARDS, get out of the car. One of them opens the back door for a huge man, MOMO, who gets out of the car and looks up at the dark building... MOMO You check this place out good? If I'm going up alone, I don't want no surprises. BODYGUARD I checked it out, boss. INT. BROOKLYN TENEMENT BUILDING – NIGHT Momo eyes the bodyguards -– both nervous -– then starts up the steps. We follow Momo as he enters the building, goes up the dark stairwell... up one flight... we're behind him the whole time... When he gets to the top floor, Momo pauses to catch his breath, before moving on down the hall to a door. Momo knocks. VOICE Yeah? MOMO It's Momo. VOICE Come in. Momo slowly opens the door... when, suddenly, the apartment is FLOODED WITH LIGHT so that we see a room full of PEOPLE, a banner on the back wall reading "HAPPY SIXTY-FIFTH, MOMO!" EVERYONE Surprise! Silence as Momo drops to his knees, gurgles something we can't understand and falls over. Suddenly a dozen faces are looking down on us as we then... CUT TO: EXT. BARBER SHOP – DAY A beautiful day in Miami. CHILI (V.O.) So what're you tellin' me, you're never gonna go to sleep again? INT. BARBER SHOP – DAY Chili and Tommy each sit in a barber chair, reading the newspaper while Fred and Ed sit nearby playing checkers. TOMMY No, I said I'm never goin' to bed. There's a difference. See, the article says most people die in their beds. I figure long as I stay outta bed, I'm safe. CHILI That's the dumbest thing I ever heard. Where do you sleep? TOMMY In an armchair. Or I go to a coffee shop, sleep there. Sit in a booth, pull my hat down. A car pulls up. Chili's no longer listening to Tommy, but now watching as Ray Bones and a BLACK GUY get out of the car. TOMMY How many people you hear ever die in a coffee shop? Tommy looks over as Ray Bones -– smaller bandage on the top of his head -– and his man enter the shop. RAY BONES You cut straight hair in this place, or just fags? CHILI Hey, Bones, looks like you're gonna have a nice scar up there. Maybe these guys can fit you with a rug, cover it up for ya. Ray Bones eyes Chili, then nods to Fred and Ed. RAY BONES Why don't you geezers take your game over to the park. The two guys leave as the Black Guy steps up to Chili... BLACK GUY This man is the man, you understand what I'm saying? He's Mr. Bones, you speak to him from now on. Chili exchanges a look with Tommy, watches as 'Mr. Bones' goes down the hall into the back office, then turns to the black guy... CHILI You can do better'n him. BLACK GUY Not these days. Not less you can talk Spanish. Ray Bones comes out with the collection book open, looking at all of the names of who owes what. RAY BONES You got a miss. Leo Devoe. Guy's six weeks over. CHILI He died. RAY BONES How'd you know he died, he tell you? Ray Bones checks his man to get some appreciation, but the guy's too busy looking at the hair rinses and shit on the counter. CHILI Yeah, he told me. RAY BONES Personally? CHILI Yeah, Ray, he personally told me he got killed in that Get Away Airlines' jet went down last month. RAY BONES What Get Away jet? CHILI It was in the Herald. RAY BONES Yeah, well, maybe the guy took out flight insurance. Check with the wife. CHILI Hey, it's your book now. You want to check it out, go ahead. He's got a dry cleaning business out on Federal Highway. Tommy gives Chili a look as the Black Guy comes over to Chili, stands next to him. Ray Bones steps over to Chili... RAY BONES Momo's dead. Which means anything was his now belongs to Jimmy Capp, including you. Tommy watches as the Black Guy picks up a pair of scissors, runs his hand along the edge... RAY BONES Which also means when I speak, I'm speakin' for Jimmy. So e.g. as of now, you start affording me the proper respect. CHILI 'E.g.' means 'for example', Ray. I think what you wanna say is 'i.e.' RAY BONES Bullshit. E.g. is short for 'ergo'. CHILI Ask your man here. Ray Bones looks at the Black Guy. BLACK GUY Best a my knowledge, e.g. means 'for example.' RAY BONES E.g., i.e., fuck you. The point is, I say jump, you say okay. Okay? TOMMY (for Chili) Yeah, Ray. Okay. Ray Bones then nods to his man who grabs Chili, holds the point of the scissors to Chili's throat... RAY BONES You owe me the dry cleaner's fifteen grand plus the juice which is what another, uhh... CHILI Twenty seven hundred. RAY BONES Exactly. You either get it from the wife or out of your own pocket, I don't give a fuck. You don't ever hand me a book with a miss in it. Ray throws the book at Chili and walks out, his man right behind him. Chili looks over at Tommy. TOMMY I told you not to -– CHILI Don't say a fuckin' word. EXT. FAY DEVOE'S BACKYARD – DUSK Where Chili sits with FAY DEVOE -– thirties, attractive, in a sundress -– on her patio. They each have a drink... FAY I hate the dry cleaning business. I hate being inside all day, around all those machines. CHILI Must be hot. FAY You have no idea how hot it is. She looks at him. Touches her drink to the side of her face. Chili finishes his drink, sets it down. CHILI I was wondering, Fay, if Leo had any life insurance. FAY I don't know of any. They sit there in silence a moment. Fay reaches over, puts a hand on his leg... FAY I trust you, Chili. I think you're a decent type of man, even if you are a crook. CHILI Thank you Fay. She finally looks at Chili... FAY I wish he really was dead, the son of a bitch. EXT. LAS VEGAS – NIGHT The strip. Mesas Casino. CUT TO: CLOSE UP OF PHOTOGRAPH Leo Devoe. Standing with Fay at Epcot Center. DICK (V.O.) That's him all right. PULL BACK TO REVEAL... INT. DICK ALLEN'S OFFICE – NIGHT A sign on the door reads "DICK ALLEN, CUSTOMER RELATIONS." A bank of video monitors show the floor of the casino. Chili sits across the desk from DICK ALLEN – lots of jewelry, a giant NEON COWGIRL out the window behind him. DICK Called himself Larry DeMille. Hit on every showgirl in town. Would tell 'em he was the 'Martinizing King of Miami'. What a moron. He returns the snapshot to Chili. DICK Anyway, you want this guy, he's in L.A. We put him on a flight after he spanked one a my cocktail girls in the Keno room. CHILI Leo spanked a waitress? DICK Apparently, way it went, he invited her to come to Santa Anita to play the ponies with him. She told him what to do with that and he gave her one on the tush. My guess, he's by his lonesome at the track right now. Chili nods. DICK Hey, Chil? Since you're goin' out to L.A. anyway. CHILI What've you got? DICK Guy owes us a hundred and fifty grand, sixty days over; a movie producer. CHILI Movie producer? Yeah, why not. As Dick Allen reaches for a pad of paper, we hear THE SOUND OF AN AIRPLANE OVER... EXT. LAX RENTAL CAR LOT – NIGHT It's raining as we TILT DOWN from a LANDING AIRPLANE to a National Car Rental BUS arriving next to a tan MINIVAN. Chili eyes the car a moment, then turns to the driver. CHILI What is this? ATTENDANT An Oldsmobile Silhouette. CHILI I reserved a Cadillac. ATTENDANT Yeah, well, this one's the Cadillac of minivans. CHILI You're kidding me, right? ATTENDANT Hey, you want La Tierra Rent-A-Car just over there, but I think all they got are Rabbit convertibles. Chili gives the driver a look then gets out of the bus, standing there in the rain, his seat getting wet, nowhere to go. He turns and stares at the minivan... EXT. KAREN FLORES' HOUSE – NIGHT All the lights are out, save the BLUE GLOW of a television coming from one of the downstairs rooms... WOMAN'S VOICE (loud whisper) Harry? INT. KAREN FLORES' BEDROOM – NIGHT As KAREN FLORES, pretty, endowed, sits up in bed wearing a Lakers T-shirt, nothing else. She looks at the big shape lying under the covers beside her. KAREN Harry. The shape doesn't move. She shakes it. KAREN Harry, God damn it, somebody's downstairs. The shape stirs, rolls over, and we see HARRY ZIMM, balding, overweight; a movie producer. He sits up. HARRY What's wrong? KAREN Be quiet and listen. HARRY I don't hear anything. We hear VOICES downstairs. KAREN Shhh -– there. And now LAUGHTER... HARRY Sounds like the television. She looks at him... KAREN When I came upstairs, you stayed to finish your drink. I told you to turn off the TV when you were through. (an afterthought) Come to think of it, I also told you you could sleep in the maid's room. HARRY Yeah, well I turned off the set. I used the remote control thing and laid it on the floor. You know what could've happened? The dog came in and stepped on it, turned the TV back on. KAREN I don't have a dog. HARRY You don't? What happened to Muff? KAREN Harry, are you going down, or you want me to? He grunts, gets out of bed. Starts looking around the room for his clothes. Harry looks out the window... HARRY Anyone skim the pool? It needs it. KAREN Harry -– HARRY I'm going. INT. HALLWAY – SAME TIME The MONOTONE VOICES become louder and more distinct as Harry moves down the curved staircase in his shirt and boxer shorts. One of the voices is familiar... We can see this is a nice place as Harry crosses the entry hall to a doorway, the FLICKERING LIGHT of the television emitting from inside the room. Harry listens at the door. Yeah, it's David Letterman. INT. KAREN'S STUDY – SAME TIME Harry moves into the glow of the big Sony, the rest of the room dark. On the tube, Dave is interviewing actor Martin Weir when suddenly the screen goes black and the desk lamp comes on. Harry jumps... HARRY Jesus Christ! Chili leans into the light, keeps his tone quiet, controlled. CHILI Harry Zimm, how you doing? I'm Chili Palmer. Harry presses a hand against his chest. HARRY Jesus, if I have a heart attack, I hope you know what to do. CHILI Where you been, Harry? Harry lets his hand slide down over his belly, taking his time, wanting to show that he has it together now. HARRY Have we met? I don't recall. CHILI We just did. I told you my name's Chili Palmer. Harry stares back, trying to figure out who this guy is. HARRY You're in pictures, right? Chili smiles. Doesn't say anything. HARRY Did you stop to think what if I had a heart attack? CHILI You look okay to me, Harry. Come over here and sit down. Tell me what you been up to. Harry takes one of the canvas director's chairs by the desk. He looks at a bottle of Dewars sitting there, runs a hand through his hair, thinks about a drink... CHILI Harry, look at me. Harry brings his hand down. HARRY I'm looking at you. CHILI I want you to keep looking right here, okay? HARRY That's what I'm doing. CHILI You know Dick Allen, Mesa's Casino? HARRY Dick Allen's a very dear friend of mine. How far you want to go with this? CHILI We're there, Harry. You signed markers for a hundred and a half, you're over sixty days past due and you haven't told anybody what the problem is. Harry looks at Chili. HARRY Jesus Christ, what're you, a collector for a fucking casino? You come in here, walk in the house in the middle of the fucking night? I thought you were an actor, auditioning, for Christ's sake. Chili nods, almost smiles... CHILI Is that right? That's interesting. You thought I was acting, huh? Harry pushes out of the chair, looks down at Chili. HARRY We'll see about this... Harry grabs the phone, punches the '0'. HARRY Operator, how do I get Las Vegas Information? CHILI Harry, lemme give you some advice. Chili leans forward, hangs up the phone with his index finger, casually reaches for the receiver... CHILI You don't want to act like a hard- on, you're standing there in your undies. You know what I'm saying? What you want to do is sit down and talk to me. Harry sits down. Chili hangs up the phone. CHILI A marker's like a check, Harry. HARRY I know what a marker is. CHILI They don't want to deposit yours and have it bounce. That annoys them. So your dear friend Dick Allen's been calling, leaving messages on your machine, but you never get back to him. I happen to be in Vegas on another matter, and Dick asks me as a favor would I look you up. I follow you over here, see you in the window with this woman, looks a lot like that actress Karen Flores, was in Grotesque, except she's not blond anymore... Harry's gaze moves to the bottle of scotch on the desk... CHILI You're not looking at me, Harry. HARRY Why do I have to keep looking at you? CHILI I want you to. HARRY You gonna get rough now, threaten me? I make good by tomorrow or get my legs broken? CHILI Come on, Harry -– Mesas? The worst they might do is get a judgment against you, uttering a bad check. I can't imagine you want that to happen, man in your position. HARRY Fuckin' basketball game. Harry reaches for the bottle of scotch and pours himself drink. HARRY Tell Dick Allen I'll cover the markers in the next sixty days at the most. He doesn't like it, that's his problem. The prick. Harry starts to take another drink, looks at Chili, not moving. HARRY So, you want me to call you a cab? Chili shakes his head, keeps staring at Harry, but with a different expression now, more thoughtful, curious. CHILI You make movies, huh? HARRY I produce feature motion pictures, no TV. You mentioned Grotesque, that happened to be Grotesque Part II that Karen Flores was in. She starred in all three of my Slime Creatures releases you might have seen. Chili nods, leans forward on the desk. CHILI I think I got an idea for a movie. INT. KAREN FLORES' BEDROOM – NIGHT Karen is sitting up in bed, listening. We hear the muffled sounds of Chili and Harry talking downstairs. She gets out of bed... INT. HALLWAY – SAME TIME Chili and Harry's conversation gets louder as Karen descends the stairs. She peers into the study, but they're not in there... INT. KITCHEN – SAME TIME Chili sits with Harry at a butcher block table, a bottle of Dewars and a couple of glasses now between them. CHILI Yeah, Leo wore these little plaid hats -– Miami, middle of the summer, this guy thinks no one's gonna notice he's balding, he wears a fuckin' hat. Harry looks up past Chili, smiles. HARRY Karen? Chili turns aronud and sees her standing in the doorway now, her arms folded across that chest, the Lakers T-shirt coming down just past her crotch. HARRY Karen, say hello to Chili Palmer. Chili, this is Karen Flores. CHILI Karen, it's a pleasure. How you doing? KAREN How did you get in the house? HARRY He's telling me an idea for a movie. It's not bad so far. (motions with his glass) Sit down, have a drink. (to Chili) Tell Karen, let's see what she thinks. KAREN Maybe you didn't hear me. CHILI The door from the patio, in back. KAREN You broke in? CHILI No, it was open. It wasn't locked. KAREN What if it was? Chili doesn't say anything, just watches her, likes the way she's handling it. HARRY You want to hear this idea? It's about a dry cleaner who scams an airline out of three hundred grand. Go on, tell her. CHILI You just did. HARRY I mean, the way you told it to me. Start at the beginning, we see how the story line develops. Chili looks at Karen. She leans in the doorway. CHILI Well, basically, this guy owes a shylock fifteen thousand, plus he's a few weeks behind on the vig, the interest you have to pay. KAREN I know what a vig is. HARRY It's the kind of situation, you don't pay, you get your legs broken. CHILI Or the guy thinks he could get 'em broken. You have to understand the loan shark's in business the same as anybody else. He isn't in it to hurt people. He's in it to make money. EXT. LEO DEVOE'S HOUSE – DAY As we see Chili talking to Fay on the front porch. CHILI (V.O.) But the dry cleaner, we'll call him Leo, he's scared, doesn't know any better, so he takes off –- INT. KAREN'S KITCHEN – NIGHT As Harry jumps in... HARRY That's Miami. He's going to Vegas. He's got a few bucks and he's thinking it's his only chance. INT. AIRPLANE – DAY We see a fidgety LEO DEVOE, a little guy in a crummy suit and a little green hat sitting there in coach, looking around. CHILI (V.O.) Leo gets on a plane, ready to go, but the plane sits there at the gate, doesn't move. Behind Leo sits a BRAT with his MOM and DAD. The parents are trying to entertain the kid with the G.I. Joes, other stuff they've brought along, but the kid spots Leo's hat as Leo looks up to listen to an announcement... CHILI (V.O.) They announce over the PA there's some kind of mechanical problem, they'll be there maybe an hour, but keep your seats in case they get it fixed sooner. Leo gets really uncomfortable now... CHILI (V.O.) The guy's nervous, in no shape to just sit there, sweat it out. So he gets off the plane... As Leo gets up from his seat, the kid knocks off Leo's little green hat, and we... CUT TO: INT. MIAMI AIRPORT COCKTAIL LOUNGE – DAY As Leo downs a drink, looks around for the waitress... CHILI (V.O.) Goes in the cocktail lounge and starts throwing 'em down, one after the other. He's motioning to her for another, when we see a PLANE taxi past the window in the b.g... CHILI (V.O.) When the plane pulls away from the gate. INT. KAREN'S KITCHEN – NIGHT As Harry interrupts. HARRY Without him. The guy's so out of it he doesn't even know it's gone. CHILI That's right. As a matter of fact... INT. COCKTAIL LOUNGE – DAY A shit-faced Leo struggles to keep his head up as he watches the waitress look out the window and gasp... CHILI (V.O.) He's still in the lounge when a plane blows up on the runway... We see a BIG FIREBALL in the b.g. as Leo's head hits the table. INT. KAREN'S KITCHEN – NIGHT As Chili lights a cigarette. CHILI So when the guy finds out it was his flight, he can't believe it. If he'd stayed on that plane, he'd be dead. Right then he knows his luck has changed. If everybody thinks he's dead he won't have to pay back the fifteen or what he owes on the vig, four and a half a week. Chili offers the pack to Karen. Karen doesn't move. KAREN The interest is four hundred and fifty dollars a week on fifteen thousand? CHILI That's right. Three percent. KAREN But a week. That's a hundred and fifty percent a year. CHILI A hundred and fifty-six. Some'll charge you more'n that, go as high as six for five on a short-term loan. So three a week's not too bad. KAREN A real bargain. She shakes her head, keeps her arms folded. Chili watches her, likes the way she's giving it to him. HARRY Keep going. CHILI Well, since Leo's name was on the passenger list... INT. AIRPORT HANGER – DAY As an FFA OFFICIAL leads Fay, a black veil over her face, amongst tables full of charred items... CHILI (V.O.) They bring his wife out to the airport where they're going through personal effects, whatever wasn't burned up. Leo's bags were on the plane, so the wife tells 'em what to look for, things only she would know about. FAY REACTS as the FFA guy points to a LITTLE GREEN HAT on one of the tables. She grabs it, clutches it to her chest, pretends to faint. INT. KAREN'S KITCHEN – NIGHT As Karen finds herself listening, despite herself. CHILI A couple days ago by, people from the airliner come to see his wife, tell her how sorry they are and all that their plane exploded and offer her a settlement, the amount based on what he would've earned operating the dry cleaner's the rest of his life. Leo had some kind of trouble with his kidneys, so they were giving him about ten years. KAREN How much is the wife offered? Chili starts to speak, but Harry cuts him off. HARRY Three hundred grand, and they take it, money in hand, babe. The guy has his wife cash the check and he takes off for Las Vegas with the dough. Gets there, he's supposed to call her, tell her when to come out. But she never hears from him again. Meanwhile, the guy's hot, runs the three hundred up to half a million... CHILI He comes to L.A... Harry raises his hand to stop Chili. He's rolling, turns to Karen now... HARRY It drives the guy nuts, he's winning but can't tell anybody who he is. You show in a back story his motivation, his desire to be famous, you know, pal around with celebrities, the headliners doing the big rooms. Now he's got the dough to buy his way in, mix with celebs and he can't resist... Harry then turns back to Chili. HARRY So he comes to L.A... CHILI I don't know about his wanting to meet celebrities, that's something new. But, yeah, he comes to L.A. Then after that, I don't know what happens. Chili looks at Karen. Patient. Not moving. HARRY That's it? That's your movie? CHILI I said I had an idea, that's all. HARRY That's half a movie, with holes in it. Maybe forty minutes of screen time. You don't even have a girl, a female lead, and on top of that, there's no one to sympathize with, you don't have a good guy. CHILI The shylock's the good guy. HARRY The shylock? He's barely mentioned. And it's not believable the wife would get a settlement that fast. KAREN Harry doesn't realize it's a true story. They both look at her now. KAREN That Miami flight that went down, it was on the news every day for about a week. Harry must've been busy. HARRY That's where you got the idea? CHILI Part of it, yeah. HARRY Wait a minute, you're not the guy, are you? The dry cleaner? CHILI You mean, Leo? HARRY You wouldn't be talking to me if you were. CHILI I'm not the guy, Harry. HARRY But you work for the casino? CHILI I'm out here looking for Leo. I just looked you up as a favor to your dear friend, Dick Allen. HARRY So you don't work for the casino? KAREN Harry, for God's sake... They both look at her. KAREN He's the shylock. She's staring at Chili again. Harry turns to him. HARRY Is that right, that's what you do for a living? CHILI What I did till recently. (looking at Karen) After I get done here I'll think about what I'm gonna do next. KAREN With your experience, you could always become an agent. Right, Harry? HARRY Yeah, that's what we need. More agents. KAREN Well. I got an audition tomorrow. HARRY No problem. You go on off to bed. Karen looks at the two of them sitting there. Not about to move. KAREN What I'm saying, Harry, is I want you and your new buddy to get out of my house. HARRY Oh, yeah, sure. CHILI Nice meeting you, Karen. She just looks at him, turns and walks out. Chili watches her go. Harry watches Chili, pours the last of the scotch into Chili's glass... HARRY I imagine in your line of work, there were times you had to get rough, you know, say one of your customers stopped paying. CHILI They always paid. Harry nods, thinks a moment, then... HARRY You pack a gun? CHILI Not really. HARRY What does that mean? CHILI Maybe a few times I have. HARRY Ever shot anybody. CHILI Once. HARRY Really? You ever been arrested? CHILI I've been picked up a couple times. Loan sharking. Racketeering. But I was never convicted. I'm clean. HARRY Racketeering, that covers a lot of ground, doesn't it? Chili looks at him. CHILI Why don't you get to the point, Harry? You want me to do something for you. EXT. FAY DEVOE'S HOUSE – MORNING As a Cadillac Eldorado pulls up out front and Ray Bones and his man get out, check out the neighborhood... RAY BONES Hi, I'm Ray, a friend of Chili Palmer's. INT. FAY DEVOE'S HOUSE – MORNING Fay watches as Ray Bones and his man go through her things. RAY BONES Have you spoken to Mr. Palmer since your husband... you know, blew up? FAY Maybe once or twice. RAY BONES (coming over) What was it you talked about? FAY Oh, nothing really? This and that. Ray Bones hits Fay Devoe in the face. She drops to her knees and cries out. Ray Bones crouches down in front of her, puts a hand in her hair. RAY BONES Fay... (pulls her head up) Fay. She looks at him. Afraid now, her nose is bleeding. Ray Bones smiles at her, strokes her hair. RAY BONES Fay, I want us to be friends. And friends don't hit each other, 'less they have to. (she nods) So whatta you say we start all over and you tell me exactly what the fuck is goin' on? EXT. SUNSET BOULEVARD – MORNING As we BOOM DOWN from a massive billboard for the movie Bonaparte starring Martin Weir as Napoleon and begin tracking with Harry's eight-year-old, battered Mercedes... INT. HARRY'S CAR – SAME TIME Harry drives, all the while gesturing with a lit cigarette. HARRY These guys, my investors, they run a limo service, came to me originally, put money in a few of my pictures and did okay, they're happy. So they come in on another deal -– this was back a few months ago when I was planning what would be my next picture, about this band of killer circus freaks that travel around the country leaving bodies in their wake. The characters, there's this seven- hundred-pound fat lady who has a way of seducing guys, gets them in her trailer –- CHILI Harry, look at me. Harry looks at him. Chili takes away his cigarette. CHILI You're trying to tell me how you fucked up without sounding stupid, and that's hard to do. Let's just get to where you're at, okay? You blew the two hundred grand the limo guys gave you in Vegas on a basketball game and you haven't told 'em about it. Why not? HARRY Because they're not the type of guys would take it with any degree of understanding or restraint. The first thing they'd do is break my legs. CHILI You got that on the brain, Harry. If you're so scared of 'em why'd you take their money to Vegas to begin with? HARRY Because I need half a million to buy a script. CHILI For a movie? HARRY A blockbuster. But quality. No mutants or maniacs. This one's gonna be my "Driving Miss Daisy". CHILI What's it called? HARRY "Mr. Lovejoy". CHILI "Mr. Lovejoy"? That's the title? HARRY It's not bad when you know what it's about. Harry pulls to the curb, faces Chili... HARRY Murray Saffrin, guy who wrote it, did all my Grotesque pictures, had it in a drawer for twenty years. He shows it to me one day, tells me he's got a star interested, would I produce it. CHILI Who's the star? Harry points across the street to the Cafe Med where we see a RED FERRARI convertible parked out the front. We see MARTIN WEIR and a WOMAN with jet-black hair sitting at a table... HARRY Two time academy award nominee, Martin Weir. CHILI Martin Weir. He played the mob guy that turned snitch in "The Cyclone". HARRY One of his best parts. CHILI No, his best part was the cripple gay guy that climbed Mt. Whitney. HARRY "Ride the Clouds". Good picture. They watch Martin and the girl a moment... CHILI She looks familiar. HARRY She's a rock star. Every day, same time, they come down here and have breakfast. He has the egg white omelet; she has the banana pancakes. He sits facing west so he can see his billboard. She faces east so she has an excuse to wear the shades. Harry pulls out, starts driving again... HARRY Anyway, Murray has this shrink, who also happens to be Martin's personal trainer's shrink. Murray gives the shrink the script and the shrink gives it to Martin's trainer who reads it to Martin while they work out, and Martin flips. Loves it. CHILI So what's the problem? HARRY The problem is Murray. He and a few other blocked screenwriters went river rafting down the Kern a few weeks ago. Murray never made it back. CHILI He drown? HARRY Heart attack. Apparently they brought a couple hookers along. Chili nods, looks up at an ANGELYNE billboard... HARRY Doris, Murray's widow, finds out about this Martin Weir thing and says since Murray and I never had any written contract, she wants five hundred grand for the script. CHILI So you're thinking what if I was to put you next to my dry cleaner. Ask him if he wants to invest his money in a movie. HARRY That, or I'm thinking what if some tragic accident were to befall the widow Saffrin -– CHILI I'm not gonna pop her, Harry. HARRY Just a thought. CHILI But I could talk to the limo guys. Tell 'em to leave you alone for a while. Make the point in a way they'd understand it. HARRY You don't even know these guys. CHILI Harry, I probably know 'em better than you do. HARRY What do you get out of this? CHILI Let's see how we get along. EXT. PARKING LOT – DAY BO CATLETT, black, tall, put together in a tan outfit: suit, shirt, tie, lies on the hood of a BLACK STRETCH LIMO, his back against the windshield, reading Daily Variety, a headline proclaiming "BONAPARTE STANDS TALL AT THE B.O." We hear the sound of an AIRPLANE and he checks his watch. He casually folds the newspaper as a 747 screams past directly overhead and we... PULL BACK TO REVEAL... LAX – DAY As Bo Catlett pounds twice on the fender... BO CATLETT That's us. INT. SOVEREIGN TERMINAL – DAY Bo Catlett walks through the terminal. We hear the arrival of the Miami flight announced over the PA as Catlett stops at one of the gates. We see a plane pulling into the gate through the glass as Bo Catlett checks out the other people waiting to greet the flight... Like, for example, the YOUNG DUDE in jeans and a wool shirt hanging out. Bo Catlett studies him a moment, then sits down in one of the chairs. He looks over at... A BIG MAN, bearded, wearing a loud Hawaiian shirt, and carrying a three-year-old GIRL in his arms. The girl licks an ice-cream, spilling some on Daddy's shirt... Bo Catlett looks over as disembarking PASSENGERS start coming through the gate. As a LATINO MAN gets off the plane and glances around. He looks uncomfortable in the loose-fitting suit, like a migrant dressed for Saturday night. The Latino Man lays his TICKET ENVELOPE on top of the trash container near the gateway... INSERT – TICKET ENVELOPE The name "Y. PORTILLO" printed on the outside. The big man with the little girl picks up the ticket and walks away. As the Latino Man heads straight for Bo Catlett. BO CATLETT Don't say nothing to me. Sit down and act like you're waiting for somebody supposed to meet you. LATINO MAN The fock you taking about... Hitting the word hard, like Tony Montana in "Scarface". LATINO MAN They nobody know me here, man. Give me the focking money. BO CATLETT Sit down. Now be looking. Man over to your right in the blue wool shirt hanging out... the other way, derecho... Bo Catlett hunches over to rest his arms on his thighs, so that the Latino Man is now between him and the dude in the wool shirt. BO CATLETT That's a federal officer, most likely DEA. He moves his leg look for the bulge. You savvy bulge? That's his backup piece... Hey. Try it without looking right at him if you can. The Latino Man, trying to be cool about it, checks out the dude in the wool shirt. Sure enough, there's a bulge down near the guy's ankle. BO CATLETT What's your name? LATINO MAN (nervous now) Yayo. Portillo. BO CATLETT Alright, Yayo, you know he's there, now forget about him. Now I'm gonna get up. Soon as I'm gone, you sit down in this same seat I'm in. You feel something under your ass it's the key to a locker where your half a million is. Along with some product we're returning. Nervous now, Yayo is staring at the guy with the wool shirt. YAYO You suppose to give me the focking money yourself. Bo Catlett gets up, adjusts his suit jacket, smoothing the long roll lapel. BO CATLETT Try to be cool Yahoo. I told you where it is. Do it how I told you and have a safe trip home. Or as you all say, vaya con Dios, motherfucker. Bo Catlett walks off, leaving Yayo sitting there, confused now, not quite sure what to do. CLOSE ON HAND HOLDING TICKET ENVELOPE The name "Y. PORTILLO" written on the jacket. PULL BACK TO REVEAL... BAGGAGE CLAIM – DAY Where the Big Man in the Hawaiian shirt waits by the carousel. His LITTLE GIRL HOLDS THE TICKET ENVELOPE. The man grabs a case from the carousel and walks to the door. He tears the baggage claim stub from the envelope and hands it to the SECURITY GUARD. EXT. BAGGAGE CLAIM – DAY As the Big Man and the little girl walk to the black stretch parked at the curb, RONNIE WINGATE, an aging surfer in a suede jacket and running shoes, holds the door open for them. RONNIE Like fucking clockwork, eh Bear? BEAR / BIG MAN Don't cuss in front of Farrah. The Bear hands the case to Bo Catlett who sits in the back of the limo... GIRL Hi, Bo. BO CATLETT How you doing, sweetie? As Ronnie gets in back with Bo Catlett, The Bear puts his daughter in a toddler seat up front, then gets behind the wheel. GIRL Here we go! EXT. HARRY'S OFFICE – DAY Two stories, part of a block of white store fronts on Sunset near La Cienega. INT. HARRY'S OFFICE – DAY Light filters through venetian blinds, illuminating a desk stacked with folders, magazines, scripts, papers, unopened mail, hotel ashtrays, a brass lamp, a clock and two telephones. HARRY I once asked this literary agent what type of writing brought the most money and the agent says, 'Ransom notes.' Chili stands looking over some of the old photographs as Harry goes through the mess on the desk. There are some of Karen, Harry with a much younger, blonde Karen. Harry with giant bugs, Harry shaking hands with mutants and maniacs, and so on. HARRY Here it is... "Mr. Lovejoy". Harry hands a script to Chili. Chili examines the cover, the first time he's ever held a movie script. He opens it to the middle... CHILI Lovejoy sits behind the wheel, watching the bar across the street, getting his video camera ready for action... (looks up) What's he doing? Following a guy? HARRY Read it. It's a grabber. Chili looks out the window as we see a long black stretch limo pull up to the curb down on the street... CHILI Hey, Harry? I think your investors are here. EXT. HARRY'S OFFICE – SAME TIME As the Bear opens the door for Bo Catlett and Ronnie... INT. HARRY'S OFFICE – SAME TIME As Harry moves away from the window. HARRY Jesus... Chili tosses the script on the desk, moves between a pair of fat red leather chairs. CHILI All right, Harry, make sure the limo guys sit here, not over on the sofa. Harry is tugging the string to lower the blinds behind the desk. CHILI No leave 'em up, we want the light in their eyes. I'll be at the desk... but don't introduce me, let it go, just start talking. You're gonna be here, behind 'em when they sit down. HARRY They'll be looking at you. They don't know who you are. CHILI That's right, they're wondering, who's this guy? You don't tell 'em. Understand, Harry? Do not tell 'em who I am. Harry glances off as we hear RONNIE SINGING down the hall. RONNIE (O.S.) In the year 2525... if man is still alive... HARRY So what do I say to them? CHILI You don't say any more'n you have to. You say, 'Well, I'm glad you assholes stopped by, so I can set you straight.' HARRY You're kidding, right? RONNIE (O.S.) If woman can survive... CHILI You tell 'em the movie's been postponed. Say, till next year, if you want. But don't tell 'em why or what you're doing. Understand, Harry? You don't tell 'em anything about Mr. Lovejoy. And the door opens. Chili sits behind the desk, watching the two of them come into the office. Ronnie singing... RONNIE They may find... He looks about the office... at the old photographs... RONNIE Harry, what year is it, man? We enter a time warp? I feel like I'm back in Hollywood of yesteryear. Harry waves them right into the two cracked red leather chairs facing the desk. Chili watches as Catlett comes first. Sitting down, he nods to Chili who ignores him. HARRY Have a seat... right over here... Ronnie sits down in the chair and hooks one leg over the arm, swings it up and down, his motor running on some chemical. He too stares at Chili. HARRY This is my associate, Chili Palmer, who'll be working with me. Harry already forgetting his instructions. Chili can't believe it. The limo guys nod to Chili and Chili nods back, trying to catch Harry's eye. HARRY I want to make sure there's no misunderstanding here. Despite rumors you might have heard, your investment in Freaks is as sound as the day you signed your participation agreement. Ronnie has his face raised to the ceiling. RONNIE I can hear you, but where the fuck are you, man? BO CATLETT (looking at Chili) What I been wondering is where's he been. RONNIE Yeah, where've you been? We haven't heard from you lately. Harry comes around to stand at one side of the desk, his back to the window... HARRY I've been off scouting locations. Interviewing actors in New York. Chili's gaze moves from Ronnie the fool to Bo Catlett the dude, the man composed, elbows on the chair arms, his hands steepled in front of him. HARRY The main thing I want to tell you, the start date for Freaks is being pushed back a little, a few months. Ronnie stops bouncing his leg. RONNIE A few months? HARRY Maybe longer. We need prep time. RONNIE Hey, Harry? Bullshit. We have an agreement with you, man. HARRY We're gonna make the picture. I've just got another project to do first, that's all. One I promised this guy years ago. Chili shakes his head, he can't believe he's hearing this. Ronnie sits up straight. RONNIE I want to see your books, Harry. Show me where it is, a two with five zeroes after it in black and white, man. I want to see your books and your bank statements. CHILI Hey, Ronnie? Look at me. BOOM. Ronnie looks over. So does Bo Catlett for that matter. CHILI You have a piece of a movie, that's all. You don't have a piece of Harry. He told you we're doing another movie first. And that's the way it's gonna be. RONNIE Excuse me. But who the fuck are you? CHILI I'm the one telling you how it is. That's not too hard to figure out, is it? Ronnie turns to Bo Catlett, the man not having moved or changed his expression the last few minutes. RONNIE Cat? Bo Catlett takes his time, gives it some thought. He looks at Harry... BO CATLETT What's this movie you're doing first? CHILI Harry, let me answer that. Catlett looks at Chili again. CHILI But first I want to know who I'm talking to. Am I talking to you, or am I talking to him? BO CATLETT (beat, smiles) You can talk to me. CHILI That's what I thought. So let me put it this way... Now it's between them. The guy studies Chili, thinks about whether or not to make a move, when Harry steps in, reaches over the desk and picks up a script... HARRY This is the project, "Mr. Lovejoy". I'm not trying to pull anything on you guys. This is it, right here. Chili looks at Harry, wonders if there's a way to shut him up without punching him in the mouth. RONNIE "Mr. Loveboy"? What is it, Harry, a porno flick? He reaches for the script. Harry backs away, holds the script to his chest. Bo Catlett notices this. HARRY It's nothing. It's fluff. Nothing you'd be interested in. Bo Catlett eyes him a beat, then pushes out of his chair... BO CATLETT Harry, you think we go to see your movies? I've seen better film on teeth. Makes no difference to me which one our money's in. So how 'bout you take our twenty points out of "Freaks" and put 'em in this other one, "Mr. Loverboy". HARRY I can't do it. BO CATLETT You positive about that? HARRY It's a different kind of deal. Bo Catlett nods, gets up. BO CATLETT Okay. Then be good enough to hand us our money back, or you think about us coming in on this new one. RONNIE By Friday, man, or you're fuckin' dead as disco. Ronnie opens his coat so that Harry can see a gun tucked in his belt... RONNIE You hear me? Bo Catlett gives Ronnie a look. BO CATLETT Take your time, Harry. (closes Ronnie's jacket) We're not animals. Are we, Ronnie? Bo Catlett glances once more at Chili then follows Ronnie out the door. Harry stares at the door a moment, senses Chili staring at him... HARRY What? CHILI I don't know, maybe I wasn't clear. But I thought... I told you to keep your mouth shut. HARRY I had to tell 'em something. CHILI Never say anything unless you have to. Chili shakes his head as Harry sits down in one of the chairs, fumbles for his cigarettes. CHILI You tell me you want these guys off your back. Next thing I know, you're saying yeah, maybe they can have a piece of Mr. Lovejoy. I couldn't believe my fuckin' ears. HARRY I said I'd think about it. What does that mean? In this town, nothing. CHILI That's the difference between you and me, Harry. I say what I mean. I want something from someone, I ask 'em straight out. I want Martin Weir, I go get Martin Weir. I don't fuck around with his trainer's shrink. HARRY His shrink's trainer. Chili looks at Harry. CHILI Take me back to my car. EXT. LAX – DAY As a plane touches down on the runway... INT. SOVEREIGN TERMINAL – SAME TIME Yayo, now soaked with sweat, is still here. He stands watching a row of lockers. He stares at one of them... CLOSE ON LOCKER The number C-18. We PUSH IN... YAYO Starts to move for it... then looks off at... MAN IN A SUIT As we quickly TILT DOWN to the guy's ankle, looks like a bulge there. We then... WHIP PAN TO... A WOMAN Dressed casually in slacks and a blouse. We TILT DOWN to her ankle, hmmm, is that a bulge? We... WHIP PAN TO... A TENNIS SHOE Tapping to some unheard rhythm and what looks like a bulge near the ankle. We TILT UP this time to reveal a LITTLE KID, listening to a walkman. YAYO Obviously losing it now, rubs his eyes and quickly walks off to a row of payphones... EXT. KAREN FLORES' HOUSE – DAY Chili's minivan is parked outfront. TOMMY (V.O.) Where you been? I been callin' all over for you... INT. KAREN'S HOUSE – THE STUDY – SAME TIME Chili sits at the desk on the phone. TOMMY (phone) Ray Bones is looking for you. He's got some kinda bug up his ass, can't sit still. INT. BARBER SHOP – DAY Tommy on the phone. TOMMY I hate to say I told you, but I did. I told you don't start nothing with him that time. INTERCUTTING TOMMY & CHILI CHILI You said don't say nothing and I didn't. TOMMY No, you just broke his fuckin' nose instead. CHILI You gonna start that again? You're just like him, all you got room for in your brain is one fuckin' thing. TOMMY All I know is he came by the barber shop, all fuckin' undone, wanting to know where you were staying in Vegas. I told him I don't know. I still don't. CHILI How'd he know I was in Vegas? You tell him? TOMMY He already knew it. CHILI Yeah, well, I'm in L.A. now. TOMMY Whatta you doing out there? CHILI I'm going into the movie business. TOMMY What're you talking about? You wanna be a movie star? CHILI I'm thinking about producing. TOMMY How you gonna do that? You don't know shit about making movies. CHILI I don't think the producer has to do much, outside of maybe knowing a writer. TOMMY Hey, Chil? I think you're fulla shit. INT. KAREN'S ENTRY WAY – SAME TIME As Karen, dressed as a B-movie queen, press kit under one arm, steps inside, freezes as she hears... CHILI (O.S.) ...call me soon as you know when Ray's coming out. INT. STUDY – SAME TIME Chili is scribbling something on a piece of paper as Karen comes into the room. Chili looks up at her as he hangs up, smiles at her. CHILI Hey... Karen. How ya' doin'? KAREN What're you doing here? CHILI I wanted to come by, apologize for coming into your house like I did last night. KAREN Lemme get this straight, you broke in again to apologize for breaking in before? CHILI No, no... you left the patio door open. You gotta stop doin' that, all the nice things you got around here. KAREN Yeah, well make sure you lock it on the way out. CHILI Rough day on the set? KAREN I spent all day crawling out of a grave. The costumer kept bitching 'cause I was ripping my nylons –- CHILI Ripped nylons work. Makes the shot more real. KAREN (regarding him) ...That's what we finally decided. CHILI Like in "Bride of the Mutant", when you played the whole end with that torn top. She looks at him. KAREN You saw that one? CHILI Yeah. When you turn to the camera to tell the alien mother that her time on earth is finished... when you give us all that look, Joan Crawford wishes on her best day she had that much presence. Not even in "Mildred Pierce" -– which by the way was a better book than a movie -– did Crawford even touch the intensity you had in that look. KAREN (beat) Yeah... that was a good scene. I mean, for a horror movie. CHILI For any movie. KAREN I know I'm better than what I've been doing the last ten years, walking around in a tank top and fuck-me pumps, waiting till it's time to scream. CHILI Man, can you scream. KAREN Yeah. It's a real gift. (beat) I'm just saying it'd be nice, one time in my career to get the chance to say one great line. You know, like in that Bette Davis picture, "Cabin in the..." CHILI "Cotton". KAREN Yeah, you know when Bette comes up to the guy on the porch, gives him a flirty look and says, 'I'd kiss you, but...' CHILI / KAREN 'I just washed my hair.' KAREN Yeah. CHILI That is a great line. Chili looks at her. CHILI How come you stopped making movies with Harry? KAREN I married Martin. That was a full- time job. CHILI You read Harry's new one? He says it's the best thing he's ever read. KAREN He must mean after "Slime Creature 3". CHILI That why Harry came over last night? See if you could help him get Martin in his movie? KAREN Harry's dreaming of a forty-million- dollar production he'll never get off the ground with a star he'll never sign. With or without my help. CHILI Harry told me Martin loves it, he flipped. KAREN Yeah, well Martin is known for his flipping. He flips over a script, and when the time comes to make a deal, he flips out. CHILI Tell you what, I'll stop by Harry's office and pick up a copy for you. KAREN Don't go out of your way. They consider each other a moment... until Chili finally checks his watch. CHILI Well, I gotta have a talk with Leo, my runaway dry cleaner. KAREN Right. See how your story ends. CHILI Yeah. Right. (then) Listen, "Touch of Evil"'s playing near my hotel. You wanna go check it out? Watch Charlton Heston play a Mexican? Karen looks caught, doesn't answer right away. CHILI Maybe some other time. He turns to go, then turns back to her... CHILI 'He tried to make love to me and I shot him.' (then) Another great Bette Davis line. Karen looks at him. Surprised. He smiles at her. CHILI See you around. EXT. BEVERLY HILLS HOTEL – NIGHT Leo Devoe, dressed in a sporty plaid ensemble, complete with little matching hat gets out of a cab, and walks to the front entrance. He tips the doorman, gives him a grin. DOORMAN Evening, sir. LEO And a good evening to you, too, sir. INT. HOTEL HALLWAY – NIGHT As Leo the high-rolling dry cleaner bounces down the hall, unlocks his door... INT. LEO'S HOTEL ROOM – NIGHT Dark. Leo enters, heads for the bottle of Chivas on the desk. Has one straight out of the bottle, ahhh, before pulling a fat wad of cash out of his jacket, tossing it on the desk like it's change from the cab fare. He then takes off the jacket, unbuttons the shirt, reaches for the Chivas again, when we hear... CHILI (O. S.) Look at me, Leo. Crash. Something glass hits the floor. Probably the Chivas bottle as Leo nearly has a fucking coronary... Leo looks over as Chili turns on the light behind him. But what catches Leo's eye is the BRIEFCASE sitting on the couch beside Chili. CHILI I wouldn't think you're that dumb, leave over three hundred grand in the closet, underneath the extra blanket, but I guess you are. LEO I didn't know where else to keep it. (then) Where would you? CHILI You're here a while, what's wrong with a bank? LEO They report it to the IRS. CHILI You don't open an account, Leo, you put it in a safe deposit box. Dip in whenever you want. Leo nods in his sporty hat and undershirt, thinking it over, what to do the next time he scams an airline. CHILI You've been losing. LEO I'm up twelve grand today. CHILI From when? You left Vegas with four- fifty? LEO Who told you that? CHILI Now you're down to three-ten in the case. You must've cooled off quite a bit since you got here. LEO How'd you know I was here? CHILI Here's another tip... Leo looks away, raises his preshaped plaid hat and recocks it, then... LEO It was Fay, wasn't it, told you about the money. She tell you my whole life history, for Christ's sake? CHILI I wouldn't let her if she tried. Why I'm here, Leo, basically, is to save your ass. LEO How? By taking my money? CHILI You can keep what you won today. That's yours. LEO It's all mine. CHILI Sit down, Leo. Leo sits down in the arm chair, stares sadly at the briefcase. CHILI I don't know how you got this far, you're so fuckin' dumb. But now you're through. I'm gonna explain to you why and I hope you're not too dumb to understand what I'm saying. Okay? Leo nods. CHILI Ray Bones is now the man you're dealing with. Ray Bones finds out what you did, he's gonna want everything you have. And when I say everything, I mean even that sporty little hat if he wants it. Then after he takes all you got, he'll most likely hit you with some kind of heavy object if he doesn't shoot you, just so you won't tell on him. Chili lets that sink in a minute. CHILI I won't do that. Take your stuff or hurt you. You have three-ten in the case, right? I'm gonna take the three hundred you scammed off the airline, but the rest of it, the ten grand? I'm gonna borrow that and pay you back sometime. Leo's squinting at him now... LEO You take all my money, but you're borrowing part of it? CHILI At eighteen percent, okay? And don't ask me no more fuckin' questions. I'm leaving. He picks up the briefrase as he rises from the sofa and Leo gets out of his chair. LEO But you won't know where I am. I don't even know where I'll be. CHILI I'll find you, Leo... Chili reaches for the door, opens it and looks back at Leo... CHILI You leave a trail like a fuckin' caterpillar. INT. HALLWAY – SAME TIME As Chili starts for the elevator. Leo steps into his doorway... LEO Wait a minute. What's this eighteen- percent-a-year shit? You want to borrow ten, the vig's three bills a week. Fifteen for the vig plus the ten, that's twenty-five big ones you go a whole year, buddy! You hear me? Chili stops, turns around. As he starts back, he sees Leo's scared look just before he slams the door shut. Chili shakes his head, starts back for the elevator. EXT. GRIFFITH PARK – NIGHT Chili drives a dark road up into the park. He rounds a corner, and we see an explosion of light up ahead as we come upon... A MOVIE SET Chili pulls in behind a row of trailers. He gets out of the car and heads for the set where Harry is now looking up at the sky and yelling at someone... HARRY How's anyone gonna see anything from way up there? CHILI Hey, Harry. HARRY Yeah, Chili. Hi. (looking up) You're fifty feet in the air! The DIRECTOR -– early twenties, dressed like a frat boy -– sits on a crane about fifty feet above the set... DIRECTOR Harry. I'm gonna boom down real fast, get a subjective p-o-v. CHILI Listen, I talked to Karen. She's gonna think about helping you out. HARRY Yeah, but whose point of view? DIRECTOR Whatta you mean, whose point of view; The audience's point of view. HARRY Get down here. I wanna talk to you. Come on... right now... (to Chili) She's gonna talk to Martin? CHILI She's thinking about it. I just need the key to your office. I just told her I'd pick up a script. Harry tosses Chili a key-ring. HARRY It's the red one. Take it off the ring. Chili sits down in one of the director's chairs that sits off to one side. He starts to take the key off the ring... VOICE Your name Vicky Vespa? Chili looks up at a bored-looking ACTRESS standing there in a blood-soaked nightie. CHILI Excuse me? ACTRESS I asked you, is your name Vicky Vespa? CHILI No. ACTRESS Then get the fuck outta my chair. Chili sits forward, sees her name printed on the back. He gets up. As she sits down, we see an ICE PICK sticking out the other side of her head. Chili sits back down next to her in the chair with HARRY ZIMM on the back. HARRY (to the director) What're you doing? I thought I told you to get down here? The kid nods to the camera operator who lowers the crane as we BOOM WAY UP... HARRY All these camera moves and weird angles and shit are gonna distance us from the emotion of the scene. DIRECTOR What 'emotion'? Girl just got stabbed in the ear with an ice pick. HARRY She's scared! Fear is an emotion! (then) Look, kid, if you remember anything from your time working with Harry Zimm, let it be the three key words to filmmaking. The kid fiddles with the crane controls. DIRECTOR Yeah? What three words, Harry? HARRY Pick 'n' Save. DIRECTOR Hm? HARRY You heard me, Pick 'n' Save. Harry turns so the rest of the crew can hear him... HARRY Now I'm gonna tell you a little story, happened to me years ago when I was so broke I had to go to the Pick 'n' Save over on Vine to buy a lousy candybar for my dinner. Chili watches the crew stop what they're doing and listen. HARRY I'm standing in line waiting to pay my two bits when I overhear this lady, call her Mildred, talking to the cashier about a movie. The Director gives a look to his assistant like 'Jesus, you believe this shit?' HARRY So Mildred says to the cashier, 'I saw the new Streisand picture.' (gets into it the way Mildred did) 'God, I just love it at the end when she brushed Robert Redford's hair off his forehead the way she did when they were together, and the way they gave each other this look that said they still loved each other, but knew they couldn't be together. That look was so... romantic.' DIRECTOR That's great, Harry. So what's the -- HARRY What she did not say was, 'I just loved the way the director moved the camera so much it made me fuckin' seasick.' All she cared about was that look. All she remembered was that look. And why do we remember things in movies? Because we can see them. Harry's right in the guy's face now... HARRY So... keep this fuckin' camera down here on the ground and shoot this scene, so we can see what the fuck is goin' on, before I get someone over sixteen to fuckin' shoot it for you! Harry walks over to Chili, sees Chili sitting there. Chili tosses Harry his key ring. CHILI Here's your keys, Harry. HARRY Get the fuck outta my chair. EXT. HARRY ZIMM'S OFFICE – NIGHT As Chili pulls out front, gets out of the minivan, he looks up, sees a light on in Harry's office. INT. CORRIDOR – NIGHT Chili walks down the hallway, dark except for a light on at the end of the hall... INT. HARRY'S OFFICE – NIGHT Bo Catlett, reading glasses, script open in front of him, looks up from Harry's desk as Chili steps into the office. BO CATLETT This ain't bad, you know it? This Mr. Lovejoy. Needs a better ending but yeah, I can see why Harry wants to do it. Chili says nothing, sits down in one of the red leather chairs. BO CATLETT You understand I knew Harry was lying, saying this wasn't any good, but holding on to it, man, like you have to break his fingers to get it from him. CHILI That's funny, I was just wondering what I was gonna break of yours to get it away from you. Bo Catlett smiles at him, doesn't give up the script. BO CATLETT I'm just explaining to you what I'm doing here. Case you think I come to rob the place, rip off any of this dusty old shit the man has. CHILI I'd never make you as a burglar, not in that outfit. Bo Catlett sits back in the chair a moment, watches Chili light a cigarette... BO CATLETT Harry called you his associate, but what does that mean? I never heard your name or read it in Variety or The Reporter or anyplace. CHILI It's what he said, I'm his associate. BO CATLETT You must bring something heavy to the deal. CHILI That's right, me. Bo Catlett picks up a piece of paper off the desk... BO CATLETT Says here you're getting Martin Weir for the part of Lovejoy. CHILI Yeah, we're getting Martin. BO CATLETT No shit, come on. How you gonna do that? CHILI I put a gun right here... (touches the side of his head) ...and I tell him, 'Sign the paper Marty or your fuckin' dead.' Like that. BO CATLETT I wonder, would that work? (then) You know who I see for Al Roxy? Harvey Keitel. The man could do it in his sleep. CHILI Harvey Keitel. Yeah. Maybe. He was pretty good in the movie "Fingers". BO CATLETT I missed that one. Or, hey, you know who else? Morgan Freeman. You know Morgan? CHILI Yeah, Morgan Freeman. But he's a colored guy. BO CATLETT So what? Where's it say in this script he's white? Color is what the part needs, man, somebody to do it has some style. The way it is now, Ronnie could do it, play himself, some cracked out asshole. (then) So whatta you think of the script? Bo watches as Chili picks up a copy of the script, begins flipping through it. CHILI Title's the first thing's got to go. And the guy's name. I mean, even this writer's name, Murray Saffrin is better than "Lovejoy". BO CATLETT I'm with you on that. And don't you think it needs a good female part? Increase the romance angle. Chili flips through the script, sees a name... CHILI There's Ilona. BO CATLETT What about her? CHILI Get something going there. BO CATLETT With Ilona? You know how old Ilona is? CHILI She's... young. BO CATLETT Young? She's fuckin' nine-years-old, same age as Lovejoy's kid. Bernie. One she calls Bernard. Have you read the script? CHILI Yeah, I read it. I was just thinking you could make her older. We might even be able to get Karen Flores. BO CATLETT Who? CHILI She's been out of movies a few years, but she's good. Real good. Bo Catlett studies Chili a moment, smiles... BO CATLETT You know what I'm thinkin'? (leans forward) You wanna make the girl older. I don't like the ending. We could do that, you and me, sit down and write the script over where it needs it. Chili flips through the script a moment... CHILI You know how to write one of these? BO CATLETT There's nothin' to know. You have an idea, you write down what you wanna say. Then you get somebody to add in the commas and shit where they belong, if you aren't positive yourself. Maybe fix up the spelling where you have some tricky words... although I've seen scripts where I know words weren't spelled right and there was hardly any commas in it at all. So I don't think it's too important. Anyway, you come to the last page you write in 'Fade out' and that's the end, you're done. CHILI That's all there is to it, huh? BO CATLETT That's all. Chili sits forward, stabs out his cigarette, exhales into Bo Catlett's face... CHILI Then what do I need you for? Bo Catlett starts for the door. BO CATLETT I really think I can be of service on this one. CHILI Yeah, well, we need a ride somewhere, we'll let you know. EXT. NUART THEATER – NIGHT As Karen walks up to the box office. A Touch of Evil on the marquis. INT. MOVIE THEATER – NIGHT Not so full. Chili sits in the middle, watching the final scene as Orson Welles gets blown away, falls into the oily river. He can't take his eyes off the screen... Karen comes in, starts up the aisle, looking for Chili. She spots him, just as he mouths the dialogue along with Marlene Dietrich... MARLENE DIETRICH (O.S.) He was some kind of man. Karen smiles, decides to wait a moment. Chili, lost in the movie... keeps mouthing the dialogue. MARLENE DIETRICH (O.S.) What does it matter what you say about people? MORT MILLS (O.S.) Good-bye, Tanya. MARLENE DIETRICH Adios. As Tanya/Marlene Dietrich resumes her slow walk away, Karen sits down at the end of the row. People start getting up to leave. Chili turns to a GUY a few seats away from him... CHILI Wow, huh? The guy gives Chili a look, puts his arm around his DATE, and quickly starts up the aisle so that Chili can now